Poem

I have been looking through some of my journals that I have kept over the past few years ... and I came across the following poem I wrote last year that I had forgotten about ...

A Poem
Liz Is:

athletic yet graceful,
kind and polite,
strong yet feminine,
loving and generous,
educated yet always learning,
funny and light-hearted,
helpful yet gives space when needed,
a dreamer and a lover,
not free from making mistakes yet humble enough to admit when she is wrong and apologize,
someone who gives love with all she has and all she is,
able to feel hurt yet always able to forgive,
keen to give hugs and kisses,
bursting at the seams with energy yet enjoys cuddling and quietly watching the sun set,
lovable and silly,
impetuous yet open to advice,
an adventurer and an explorer,
grounded in her values yet open to new and different ways and opinions,
vulnerable and honest,
someone who loves a good conversation and connecting with others,
happy yet "...seeking love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love."

I am thankful I keep journals that I can look back upon to see where I have been and how far I have come. I have realized recently that I have lost some of my hope and joy and I know this because I don't sing along to my songs very often anymore, I don't dance in my living room much, I don't bounce on my trampoline much anymore. And when I sometimes feel low, directionless, sad, and like I am not going to find what I am looking for ... I reread some of my journal entries and am reminded of the bigger picture ... that life is more than this moment ... even though I am not where I want to be, I can make the choice to change .. I am reminded of the hope I had a year ago ... and I can transfer it to the NOW.

I don't want to die alone.

But I think I need to be prepared to accept that I may die alone. A good friend pointed out that they had to learn to accept this too ... that to reach this point not only means we have faith in God, but it also means we trust God. I believe I will be blessed ... but the timing of it is in God's hands.

Patience ... a never-ending virtue in my life! ;)

Cheers,
Liz

:)